Soccer AM

The Soccer AM crew: Rock 'n' Roll

As the season draws to one of the most exciting climaxes ever, the Soccer AM crew have been getting a bit hot under the collar - albeit for very different reasons.

Chelsea fan Tubes sweated it out at Stamford Bridge on Saturday to see his beloved Blues run out 2-1 winners over Manchester United, courtesy of a Michael Ballack brace. Still flushed by the triumph, he helpfully summed up the afternoon thus: "The sun was shining. We won. I was happy."

Tubes doesn't have many fingernails left to bite as the title chasers enter the home straight, but were the teams to finish all square in every imaginable respect, he told the gang that he'd come up with the perfect way to separate the men from the boys - a quick round of Paper, Scissors or Stone.

It's not all been warm glows and fuzzy feelings for the crew, though. In fact, a few of them have been seeing red about some very important issues - and let rip in the weekly Tuesday morning meeting.

Tubes' cage has been really rattled by the "poor quality" of acts on the latest series of Britain's Got Talent.

Jimi, meanwhile, was left fuming after waiting at least eight minutes for his burger at a popular fast-food restaurant.

But Rant Of The Week goes to Graham who's got beef with footballers wearing long, basketball-style shorts. Like Liverpool, for example. Graham wants to see the return of the good old days when Glenn Hoddle wore shorts that were er, short.

"They're just far too long now," he cried, "footballers' legs are insured for millions - so let's see them!"

It was left to Baby Elvis to tell the crew that it was better to be a lover, not a fighter. Letting the boys into some of his dating secrets, he revealed that he treated one lucky lady to a night out in Kingston to watch the scary new Jessica Alba flick.

Call us cynical but could it be that his choice of horror film was just a sly attempt to slip a comforting arm around his damsel in distress?!

Other than that, it seems that the Soccer AM team's glorious 10-3 victory over Forever Bury FC at Gigg Lane last week has come at a price - all some people wanted to do was sleep after their exertions.

Take Graham, he slept so much that he missed his flight to Berlin - and he didn't even play! He was ill though, so we'll let him off...

Finally, Lisa takes this week's prize for Best (a dubious choice of adjective, we admit) Celebrity Spot. She lived it up at a bar in London's Piccadilly with the cast of Strictly Come Dancing but, sadly, failed to come back with any tango tips.

Oh, and Steve sent the gang into fits of laughter when he let slip that the highlight of his weekend had been a trip to the post office. It's all rock and roll here at Soccer AM. 'Til next week...